Thursday, June 25, 2009

My Jealous Plan

So much of life is about waiting. Seems there are times when I find myself waiting on several things that all will change my next step, so the question becomes what do I do while I wait? I'm usually pretty good at living in the moment and accepting the waiting as part of the present. And it really is just that when I think I about it. To live in the moment means living in waiting. Expectation. Anticipation. Uncertainity. Hope. Doubt.
I trust God and I believe he has a plan. I just don't trust my handling of his plan.
You see, I have a plan also. A plan that keeps jumping up when I think I've got it safely stored out of sight and out of mind. My plan likes to be cared for, examined, stroked and focused on. My plan wants my undivided attention and it's jealous. Jealous of me allowing God to have a plan. Jealous of me working on anything not in the plan's best interest. My plan says, "Sit and think about me today. Don't spend time on other possibilities or abilities. Don't worry about other people and their plans. Their plans are stupid and not nearly as important as me."
Hmmm, could my plan be an idol for me? Something I, at times, put above God?

1 comment:

Jodie said...

Wow, Kay. Very honest and very REAL. I think your plan has a twin living in my head. You're preachin' to me today!