Love Happens. Respect is Work.
Love starts a relationship. Respect is the glue that holds it together. Happy families, I believe, are more about respect than they are about love. Respect for each person in the family - between parents, between parent and child, and between siblings.
Love gets all the good press because it's above us, beyond us - something tinged with magic and supernatural power. It just happens - romantic love is all about that glance, that moment, that spark. With our children it's that moment when they are placed in our arms. Overwhelming love that just happens - no work to it. So, being outside our control, we place Love on a pedestal and worship it.
Respect - well, in the words of Rodney Dangerfield - it don't get no respect. Why? Because we understand it so very well. There's not even a tad of magic. It's all about thinking and being aware and working and standing your ground and being humble and saying "I'm sorry" or "You let me down" or "I can't do that". It's not shiny and pretty. You can't get it, without giving it. You can't get it, without earning it. Getting it is hard, ugly, dirty work and once you have it - you can still loose it at a moments notice.
Like I said earlier, I believe Happy families are more about respect than they are about love. What do you think?
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, July 12, 2010
Friday, October 9, 2009
Thank God for Dirty Dishes
Thank God for dirty dishes
For they have a tale to tell.
While others may go hungry,
We're still eating well.
With Health and Home and Happiness,
We surely shouldn't fuss.
For by the "stacks" of evidence,
God's been very good to us.
A plaque with that saying on it hung above our kitchen sink as I was growing up. I didn't even realize I'd memorized it until it popped up in my mind one day after I was an adult. Since then, I've used it in devotionals, children's sermons, and classes. This morning I used it to get myself in a better frame of mind.
I'm thankful for vacuuming because it means my house is carpeted.
The clouds this morning, and rain forecast for the weekend, make the sunny days brighter.
Not getting news about my writing endeavors means - I still have a shot!
Spending money on weddings and college, means my kids are in love and getting an education.
There, that's much better.
And always, I'm so thankful Mama and Daddy are grateful people who would not only have a plaque like that hanging in our kitchen, but that they lived it everyday.
For they have a tale to tell.
While others may go hungry,
We're still eating well.
With Health and Home and Happiness,
We surely shouldn't fuss.
For by the "stacks" of evidence,
God's been very good to us.
A plaque with that saying on it hung above our kitchen sink as I was growing up. I didn't even realize I'd memorized it until it popped up in my mind one day after I was an adult. Since then, I've used it in devotionals, children's sermons, and classes. This morning I used it to get myself in a better frame of mind.
I'm thankful for vacuuming because it means my house is carpeted.
The clouds this morning, and rain forecast for the weekend, make the sunny days brighter.
Not getting news about my writing endeavors means - I still have a shot!
Spending money on weddings and college, means my kids are in love and getting an education.
There, that's much better.
And always, I'm so thankful Mama and Daddy are grateful people who would not only have a plaque like that hanging in our kitchen, but that they lived it everyday.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Anyone? Anyone?
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. ---Ferris Bueller
The sun coming up through the Bradford Pear trees in my back yard is at the same position as when I took a picture of it in the spring. That morning, also cool, the trees were covered in white blossoms and the sun's rays pierced through in clear, yellow-white light. It was Spring in a picture.
Now the sun's rays are golden and the tree is covered in dark green, headed to burgundy, leaves. The morning is almost cold, especially for Georgia. We got down into the 40's last night.
Seems like I took the blossom picture only a few days ago.
That's what made the quote from Ferris Bueller come to mind.
Summer '09 has come and gone. I don't think I have any regrets. Those things I wanted to do, I did. The hard talks, the fun times, the days in the pool, the visits, the dinners on the deck. When I think of not missing life, I often think of the fun, exciting things. But I'm coming to realize that a big part of not missing life is not letting people slip through my fingers. But sometimes that's hard - and not at all fun.
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
The sun coming up through the Bradford Pear trees in my back yard is at the same position as when I took a picture of it in the spring. That morning, also cool, the trees were covered in white blossoms and the sun's rays pierced through in clear, yellow-white light. It was Spring in a picture.
Now the sun's rays are golden and the tree is covered in dark green, headed to burgundy, leaves. The morning is almost cold, especially for Georgia. We got down into the 40's last night.
Seems like I took the blossom picture only a few days ago.
That's what made the quote from Ferris Bueller come to mind.
Summer '09 has come and gone. I don't think I have any regrets. Those things I wanted to do, I did. The hard talks, the fun times, the days in the pool, the visits, the dinners on the deck. When I think of not missing life, I often think of the fun, exciting things. But I'm coming to realize that a big part of not missing life is not letting people slip through my fingers. But sometimes that's hard - and not at all fun.
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Autumn again.
Sitting in my rocking chair looking out the front windows, I notice the maple across the street is beginning to turn. Before long it will be orangy-yellow. The tall walnut beside our house will be pure gold, towering over our roof. A jewel-toned tapestry is what the oak will remind me of and the half dozen crepe myrtles will turn peachy-red. And then every single leaf will fall to the ground. Every one. Hard to imagine.
When we lived in Jacksonville, Florida folks took their vacations in the fall to go to Tennessee and "see the leaves turn". Since I'd grown up in Tennessee, I thought that was funny. Until I spent a couple falls in Florida. Then I found myself seeking out roads lined with sumac - basically a spindly weed, but which turns scarlet red in the fall. That was the height of my autumnal glory for a few years.
I love summer, but when the leaves begin to look tired and the flowers struggle to appear happy, I'm ready for everything to have a rest. For the trees to go out in a blaze of glory. For the zinnas and begonias to be put out of their leggy misery. For the sky to deepen to match the deep blue of September's birth stone. All signs it is time to say goodbye to summer.
When something's been good, it's hard to let go. With two engagements this past week and Lizzy settling in and busy at college, the future is very much with us. However, sometimes in the early darkening of the afternoons, I remember those days when I gathered my little ones inside as the leaves fell. Remember the laughter and red cheeks around the table, eager to share supper with mom and dad, brother and sister. Tales of their days at school or play winding down in cozy beds sheltered from brisk winds.
Lengthening shadows seem to lenghthen my memories.
When we lived in Jacksonville, Florida folks took their vacations in the fall to go to Tennessee and "see the leaves turn". Since I'd grown up in Tennessee, I thought that was funny. Until I spent a couple falls in Florida. Then I found myself seeking out roads lined with sumac - basically a spindly weed, but which turns scarlet red in the fall. That was the height of my autumnal glory for a few years.
I love summer, but when the leaves begin to look tired and the flowers struggle to appear happy, I'm ready for everything to have a rest. For the trees to go out in a blaze of glory. For the zinnas and begonias to be put out of their leggy misery. For the sky to deepen to match the deep blue of September's birth stone. All signs it is time to say goodbye to summer.
When something's been good, it's hard to let go. With two engagements this past week and Lizzy settling in and busy at college, the future is very much with us. However, sometimes in the early darkening of the afternoons, I remember those days when I gathered my little ones inside as the leaves fell. Remember the laughter and red cheeks around the table, eager to share supper with mom and dad, brother and sister. Tales of their days at school or play winding down in cozy beds sheltered from brisk winds.
Lengthening shadows seem to lenghthen my memories.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Stuck in a Dark Parking Lot
I locked my keys in my car last night. As a friend and I left a book club meeting, I discovered my keys weren't in my purse or pockets. Mike is in California, so no getting keys from home. And because he's out of town, I'd made sure the house was locked up tight. The only way for me to get into my house, was to get the keys out. And the only way to do that, was to find a locksmith who would come to downtown Roswell after 9 pm.
An earlier blog this week http://bit.ly/nVSEe talked about the birds in our yard and the lengths we go to to attract them. I wondered that day about the friends I've gathered and surrounded myself with.
Last night, my wondering was answered, again. Cindy never made me feel guilty or stupid. Never sighed or looked at her watch as the minutes creeped by. The leader of the book club, a woman I barely know, insisted on driving us to the police station. Without a moments hesitation, she handed me her cell phone, because I forgot my phone at home. Catherine drove us to a couple places looking for help and never once acted like it was a chore. Cindy's husband, Mark, looked up 24-hour locksmiths and called her with numbers. I kept Cindy's phone through several calls from the locksmith as he tried to find the parking lot we were in.
Mike and I have never lived near family. From the very beginning we had to search out these kinds of friends. The ones that will drop what they are doing and cheerfully be there for you. We found them at church. From Jacksonville, to Tampa, to Chicago, to Marietta, we found family in the pews of a local church. Of course that's not the only place to find wonderful people, but if you're looking to add some to your life - I believe it's a good place to start.
An earlier blog this week http://bit.ly/nVSEe talked about the birds in our yard and the lengths we go to to attract them. I wondered that day about the friends I've gathered and surrounded myself with.
Last night, my wondering was answered, again. Cindy never made me feel guilty or stupid. Never sighed or looked at her watch as the minutes creeped by. The leader of the book club, a woman I barely know, insisted on driving us to the police station. Without a moments hesitation, she handed me her cell phone, because I forgot my phone at home. Catherine drove us to a couple places looking for help and never once acted like it was a chore. Cindy's husband, Mark, looked up 24-hour locksmiths and called her with numbers. I kept Cindy's phone through several calls from the locksmith as he tried to find the parking lot we were in.
Mike and I have never lived near family. From the very beginning we had to search out these kinds of friends. The ones that will drop what they are doing and cheerfully be there for you. We found them at church. From Jacksonville, to Tampa, to Chicago, to Marietta, we found family in the pews of a local church. Of course that's not the only place to find wonderful people, but if you're looking to add some to your life - I believe it's a good place to start.
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