Wednesday, October 21, 2009

When versus If

When people ask me if I'm always happy my standard answer is, "I tried sad once and didn't like it."
Well, now I've tried being an "if" person and that's not working out for me either. A week ago I blogged - "However, in endeavors we spend so much time saying, "When I get the scholarship. When I get drafted. When I get an agent. When I get the job. When I get discovered. When we get the bid. When When When - Never the dreaded word "IF." Never. In the world of keeping on-keeping on, saying "IF" shows lack of belief, faith, determination."
I have nothing more to base a "when" on than I did last week, but I'm a happier person and way more functional dealing in belief. Sure, it may be delusional, but maybe it's like my feelings about fairies from a blog in August (
"I'd rather believe fairies exist, than deal with a world where they don't."
For the past eight days I've lived in a world with limited possibilities for publication of my book. Last night I realized that's not who I'm called to be. I'm called to be the fairy-believing, hope always, laugh when you mess up, look for signs everywhere, know God has a plan and is CRAZY about me, person.
I do want to say thanks to those of you who know me well and have kept me in your prayers this week. Your cards and emails meant a lot to me. Sorry you have a friend who would drag you along for such a dreary ride! Here's one of my favorite quotes from the Anom. guy.
"Until further notice - Celebrate Everything!"
That Anom. sure sounds like a "when" person to me.

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