Friday, January 22, 2010

Happy New Year!

Finally I feel ready to start the new year. Earlier this month I blogged about 2010 feeling sketchy
And that feeling has persisted, even as the calendar ignored me and kept moving forward. Mike was headed to the airport yesterday around the same time I was driving past it headed home. So last night I rested from the trip, unpacked, and watched several hours of mindless TV - all in a quiet, clean house. And this morning feels like a new year. Not sure why. But I'm filled with new thoughts of doing things different, better. Eating, writing, living, doing - all those feelings I so look forward to when the Christmas decorations come down - usually. This year they didn't come - maybe it was the whole fear thing about not sure what 2010 holds.
And maybe it was just a hangover from all the swell of emotions and highs of 2009. It was an exciting, life-changing year in so many ways. How many times have I said in this blog I want to feel it all, not miss a moment, pay attention to the details? And I do - that's who I am. But that comes with a cost. Obviously, everything does.
When 2009 ended, it felt like when you drag yourself out of the ocean away from the waves and undertows which brought laughter, fear, exhilaration - and fall onto the sand.
But now, toweled off and having caught my breath, I'm ready for what comes next. I'm thankful for the passage of time, which I would've stopped until I was ready. Good thing I'm not in charge of that, isn't it? And I'm thankful for the knowledge that perceptions change. If we give them time and space - and don't fight those changes too hard.
Happy New Year!


Anonymous said...

Happy New Year!!

Great post.

Kay Dew Shostak said...

Thanks, Lynn!

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