Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Slipping through my Fingers

Yesterday I read a book I apparently had already read. It was a thriller by James Patterson and it seemed familiar, but I couldn't remember what happened in it - until I read it. As I finished reading an event, I'd think, "Oh, yeah. I knew that." And I thought at some point the ending would jump out of wherever it was buried, but that didn't happen - until I finished the book. I believe I may read too much and too fast.
Then last night I watched "Mamma Mia!". On the morning of her daughter's wedding Meryl Streep sings "Slipping through my fingers."
I bawled.
When Lizzy gets back from mission camp she'll have two weeks before we move her to college. I've tried to make sure everything gets done, no regrets, nothing missed. But where did the time go? Her birth was one of the most joyous moments of my life, when the doctor said we had a girl I remember my heart almost breaking through my chest. All the shopping and giggling and emotions and. . . and. . . and. . . All for me and my girl to share.
She goes to college in two weeks.
This summer has been like that book yesterday. Everything is just out of my grasp and then as soon as I get hold of it - it slips through my fingers. She slips through my fingers.
"Slipping through my fingers all the time
I try to capture every minute
The feeling in it
Slipping through my fingers all the time
Do I really see what’s in her mind
Each time I think I’m close to knowing
She keeps on growing
Slipping through my fingers all the time"


Jodie said...

Oh, Kay! How beautiful! And what a great metaphor in the book... Now you're gonna make me cry...

Lauren said...

Now, you definitely made me cry. And I probably will until after Edward leaves tomorrow.

The other Kay said...

Ah, I remember those days...In two weeks, you'll send her off to college. And after college, Lizzy will likely get a job, marry, have babies, go to Little League Games, go camping, bake cookies, have swim parties...do all the the things with her little ones that you did with her. She'll teach them values and shower them with wisdom she learned from you. She'll kiss lots of boo-boos and wipe lots of tears... Then eventually, she'll cry at their High School graduation, before sending them off to college. But in your eyes, she'll still be your little girl. I know, because I've been there. Camille will always be my little girl.

Kay Dew Shostak said...

Thanks, Kay - you made me cry again! I just think you are great! So glad I met you.

Erica Faraone said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who can read a book for the 2nd time (or watch a movie) with the "I already knew that, but I can't remember what happens next" syndrome! :-) My oldest son leaves for college in 2 wks and because we adopted him and his brother & sister only 5 years ago (when their bio dad died), I always knew the time would go too fast. Way too fast. And it has. But I'm so proud of him and even though time does slip through our fingers, we trust that what God has next for all of us in our family relationships will be amazing. I know you believe that too, but the tears will still come when we have to send him off! You captured the emotions beautifully. (And for the record, the line of the song about how we think we get close to knowing our daughter & then she grows & changes SO describes my relationship w/ my 17 yr. old "almost-woman-girl" right now.) Thanks for this post!

Kay Dew Shostak said...

Hey Erica - so glad you enjoyed it. Isn't it amazing how many people in the world we share emotions and life events with? How amazing that you built your family like that. Those children are so blessed to have you - and I know you feel like you're the one that's been blessed. My daughter comes home today and the the two week count down begins. wow. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!